So, do you want to know how I really feel about having four boys? Do you want to know what I really thought when I found out the twins I’m carrying were also boys?
I’ll tell you.
Really freaking BLESSED.
Listen. I’m not going to lie to you. I was hoping we’d get at least one girl out of this whole twin deal. Despite Justin’s entire family being males with the exception of the women who birth them, I figured we could defy the odds again if we’d already defied them once by conceiving twins.
But I was very wrong. 😂
After rushing to Lamb’s Ear to have them package up two little hats revealing the genders of our babies, I got home as quickly and as safely as possible so that Justin and I could see what was inside.
We opened the first package to find a tiny hat with blue and green golf balls, clubs and carts on it. One boy! Not shocking, y’all. Not shocking at all.
We opened the second package to find… the exact same hat! Another boy! Also NOT SHOCKING.
Did I cry? No. Did I feel a little disappointed? If I’m being honest, sure. It was my last shot at getting the daughter I’ve always dreamed of having.
But here’s the thing – wanting a daughter doesn’t make me sad that I’m having two more sons. It does not steal my joy nor my gratitude.
Having two more sons is such an incredible blessing. I spent the majority of last year wondering if I’d ever be able to get pregnant again. I thought that maybe two kids would be it for us.
So to be able to carry, raise and love two more boys?! To be able to have a family of SIX when I wasn’t sure that a family of five was going to happen?! Oh my goodness!!! Talk about a wildly unexpected blessing. The tears actually well up in my eyes as I type these words.
And here’s the other thing. I believe that God makes no mistakes when he creates us. As Jeremiah 1:5 states, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…”
God formed each of my boys in His image, just as he did Justin and me and you. And He’s given Justin and me each of these boys to raise and parent as only we can for the time that we inhabit this earth.
And so I truly believe that being a “boy mom” is part of what I was created to do, because me being who I am was intentional just as all of them being boys is. Exactly zero mistakes were made.
Before finding out the genders, a friend reminded me of what a high calling it is to raise boys into good men, and OH, the truth of that statement! It has truly stuck with me and makes me feel so honored to be able to be these boys’ mama.
I know that the future is filled with it’s fair share of challenges, but it’s also going to be filled with so much love, fun, energy, joy and beautiful memories that I can hardly wait to make. And if we’re being honest, it’ll probably also be filled with mischief, several broken bones and a decibel level in our home that I’ve yet to experience in my life.
Having four boys within six years of each other isn’t something I ever saw coming, but I feel so fortunate to be able to experience it. I feel so lucky to be able to have a big family full of boys.
So how do I really feel? I feel good. I feel really really good. How could I not?